Ben Proctor's story

It was August 2004, I was 15 and had just started work as a lifeguard at a local holiday park. I would have said I was the 'healthiest' person I knew, running at least 5 times a week and being one of the top athletes in Yorkshire at the time.

I'd had a bit of a cold, nothing too major. But then one day I suddenly felt a lot worse. Every so often lights would hurt my eyes and my vision would go blurry, as if I had stood up too quickly. My teeth began chattering and I couldn't really talk – I felt shivery yet hot. The doctor was called and after a quick check-up she decided it was probably flu but did say to be wary as the issue with the lights is a tell-tale sign of meningitis.

I woke up around 4am the next day with the worst headache I could ever imagine – nothing would stop the pain. A few hours later the vomiting started. That's where it goes blank. Speaking to my Dad he said I lost the ability to speak, my eyes glazed over and I was rushed straight to hospital (despite furiously trying to fight off the paramedics).

Fast forward a few days and I woke up in intensive care, well aware of where I was (which I must have picked up from people talking to me whilst I was in an induced coma). I've felt better; my body ached everywhere and I felt weak. The infamous rash was starting to wear off – it was probably the last symptom I developed. I had no memory of what had happened but from speaking to family members I now know I was rushed to hospital, and after the doctors realised the seriousness of my condition I was transferred to a larger hospital and immediately placed in an induced coma. The doctors had estimated my chances of survival at 20%. I was later told by one doctor he actually thought my chances were closer to zero. It was later confirmed that I had contracted meningitis A, B and W along with septicemia.

Thinking back now, I just felt numb. I wasn't in any state to realise the magnitude of the situation and it took me some time to really take stock of how ill I had been.

I was transferred back to the local hospital and after two weeks of intensive treatment I was discharged – I'd lost around 5 stone, had double vision (my eyes were so tired they constantly twitched), was unable to speak due to the intubation irritating my vocal chords and I still had a tingling sensation at the top of my spinal cord. But I was lucky, I hadn't lost any limbs and I had survived – now I just wanted to forget about it. Unfortunately my body had other ideas.

As I went back to school I found myself irritable, I'd snap at others and would constantly feel low and that people blamed me for being ill. One evening I just broke down, I felt terrible and I had no idea why. I visited the doctor with my parents and was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder. After a time it wore off and I came to terms with what had happened to me. I began to realise just how lucky I was and to focus on the future, not on what had happened.

Throughout my illness and afterwards, the Meningitis Research Foundation were there to explain things and support my parents – an open ear whenever they were confused or worried. In 2014, ten years after my illness, I plucked up the courage to raise money for the Foundation by skydiving, and followed this up by participating in the Great North Run last year. The Foundation really does make a difference; even to me, someone who did not have any life changing long term effects.

BEN PROCTOR
FEBRUARY 2016