Then, without warning, he was violently sick and had a fit. His toes, fingers and ears started turning blue.
I felt like the ground was opening up and swallowing me, I felt so sick. I was taken aside and told he only had a one per cent chance of pulling through. They put him on life support - his organs were failing. My husband was dying in front of my eyes and I so needed to hold him.
He was rushed to intensive care at another hospital but I was told he could die en route. I felt so alone, following the ambulance in a trance, I suppose hoping he was alive.
When he got there septic shock had set in, his kidneys had failed. The next time I saw him was frightening: he was attached to so many machines and had so many doctors around him. I was told they had a fight on their hands; he was critical and the next few hours would tell.
From that time on I never stopped talking to him. Doctors and nurses taking blood, x-rays, one antibiotic after another, but I just talked. I could not lose him and I hoped he could hear me. I kept telling him to fight.
He survived the next three days, and then another infection set in. This was not happening. I was taken into a small room that was filled with doctors and nurses. I felt so small and so afraid. Once again they told me that he was still critical, but they wanted to give him a drug called Protein C for the immune system. Three doses would cost £10,000: what did I care about the cost; "please anything" I said.
Later the nurse said: "Here they are, these three little packets." Was this the miracle I was praying for? I watched as the first one went up. The world was turning but I stood still. I could not wake up from this nightmare.
15th January - finally the words I had so longed to hear again. "How I love you" came out of his mouth. It never sounded so good as it did at that moment.
Meningitis had however done its worst: he had lost two stone in weight, had no memory from Christmas Eve onwards and some memory loss going back further. He was left with bad heads, would cry for no reason and all I could do was hold him in my arms and say it was alright. He had been to hell and back and it will get better in time.